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Konrad Werner: Die Welt does a Breitbart

Another week, another tiresome hatchet job on Muslims in Germany. Only this time the Springer Verlag pre-emptively plays to the Breitbart audience.

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Konrad Werner: Andrej Holm, the Stasi teenager

Everybody has an opinion about Andrej Holm, but it depends a lot on what you thought about the capitalist orgy of Berlin's housing situation before.

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Konrad Werner: It's not just terrorists spreading fear

Terrorists feed on our news-fevered brains.

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Konrad Werner: Punching Björn Höcke in the face would be patriotic

There is no tolerating Nazis. That is the whole point of Germany.

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Konrad Werner: Germany condemns Trump, but makes money off him

Germany has an old rule when it comes to foreign despots – condemn first then do business. It's working for Trump too.

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Konrad Werner: The good kind of banality

Politics and diplomacy are alright, but sometimes it takes dull bureaucracy to resist dictators like Erdoğan. So cheer for health and safety regulations in the town of Gaggenau. #FreeDeniz

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Konrad Werner: Why Schulz is an upgrade on Merkel

There's more to the centre than just centrists – Martin Schulz is a real alternative to Angela Merkel.

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Konrad Werner: Merkel's government and the car industry are identical

Merkel just hired Opel's chief lobbyist as her campaign manager. Because that's what CDU governments do.

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Konrad Werner: Worrying about integration again

Some Turkish people in Germany voted "Evet" (yes) in Erdoğan's referendum last Sunday. The German newspapers decided that this means society is collapsing, and Turkish people have to sort it out.

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Konrad Werner: Saudi Arabia is Germany's new moral guru

Saudi Arabia has said it won't bother Germany for more weapons again, because of the political problems. The German government is all like: Oh, we don't mind. We sold a load of "Dingos" to a Kurdish...

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Konrad Werner: No more love for the SPD?

The North Rhine-Westphalia result is sad, but then again it's the SPD's own fault.

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Konrad Werner: Deflated innocence

Why doesn't the "Die Welt" balloon have "Die Welt" anymore, and what's that have to do with the reason why German newspapers almost never criticize German businesses?

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Konrad Werner: Helmut Kohl, at least he believed in something

Here's something nice about Helmut Kohl.

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Konrad Werner: Goodbye, Volksbühne

The Volksbühne under Frank Castorf was funny and exhausting and ingenious and dense and uncompromising and communist. Konrad will miss it.

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Konrad Werner: When is Europe going to stand up for itself?

Turkey is imprisoning people at will, Poland is subjugating the judiciary, Hungary is putting up anti-semitic posters and beating the shit out of migrants. Why are we still complaining about politics...

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Konrad Werner: The NSU prosecutors' argument is a joke

After 375 trial days, this week the prosecutors in the NSU trial started presenting their closing argument – and left everyone wondering if they knew what was happening.

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Konrad Werner: If you vote for a racist person, you might be racist

The AfD and their voters hate Germany's integration commissioner because they don't believe in integration. That's the whole point.

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Konrad Werner: No, the AfD isn't falling apart

It was fun watching Frauke Petry walk out of the AfD's triumphal press conference this week. But it doesn't mean the party is disintegrating.

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Konrad Werner: The pointless AfD-appeasing refugee cap

The election has not changed Merkel's mind – the German policy on refugees is still: keep them out and pretend you're not racist.

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Konrad Werner: Merkel's coalition talks will never end

Angela Merkel's fourth government will be one long coalition negotiation. Just like life, isn't it?

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